My Friday night:

1. Pick up toddlers from preschool.
2. Explain to one toddler that we are going to listen to music on the way home and he can "take a nap" in his bed when we get home if he so desires.
3. Make dinner for four kids (and me).
4. Try to get kids to eat dinner.
5. Realize one toddler is hiding and refusing to come to the table because she has had an accident in her pants and is ashamed.
6. Bathe said toddler and her brother.
7. Clean out a legit nasty underwearful of feces.
8. Try to get kids to finish dinner.
9. Clean kitchen.
10. Have an impromptu Michael Jackson dance party in the kitchen.
11. Tuck in toddlers to the tune of one of them crying for 30 minutes.
12. Put slippers on the crying child so he'll go to sleep. (That's what he finally decided he wanted).
13. Watch "The Odd Life of Timothy Green" with the older two kids.
14. Answer incessant questions about the movie and listen to a recap of what just happened as we're watching from the two older kids.
15. Grade quizzes while watching movie.
16. Cry while watching movie.
17. Solve cat's-scratching-me-while-I'm-trying-to-go-to-sleep problem of one of the older two.
18. Listen to the cat scratching at the door of the room he's locked in while the kids fall asleep.
19. Unload and reload dishwasher.
20. Hit the late-night snack I'll regret when I weigh-in on Monday.

What can I say? I party hard.